Walkin' Home

Fortune: Your reputation is your wealth.

I dunno

From the Portsmouth Herald:
Maine resident seeks wife, offers cash reward

By Deborah McDermott
May 20, 2008 2:48 PM
WELLS, Maine — Are you a female between the ages of 23 and 43, an outdoor type with a sense of humor, and looking for love? And, oh yes, could you use $5,000?
Charles Haeberle could be looking for you.
The 39-year-old Key West transplant has been in Maine for six years, hoping to meet Ms. Right. "I dated a few girls here and there. They were very nice, but they weren’t THE girl. I’m just searching for what everyone’s searching for — a girl I can spend the rest of my life with."
Now he’s ready to put his money where is heart is. Haeberle, a Wells resident and general manager of the Lodge at Kennebunk, took out an ad last week in The York Weekly offering $5,000 to the woman he marries.
Actually, he will pay $400 after the fourth successful date, $1,100 at the engagement and $3,500 at the wedding."
Everybody needs money and I have money, so I figured what the heck," said Haeberle. "I know it sounds silly. But really, it costs no more than it costs for an online dating service. And I haven’t had much luck with them. So I figured why not cut out the middle man?"
Haeberle came to Maine at the urging of his mother, who, as the ad states, told him, "Go to Maine. You will find a nice girl."
"When I first moved here, where did she send me but Ogunquit," he said with a laugh, referring to the fact that many gay and lesbian people vacation there. After going to a couple of different bars, "I said, 'Mom, I don’t think this is where I belong.’"
He said he loves Maine and has grown very fond of his adopted home."
If you live somewhere else in the country, the rumor is that people from Maine and New England are stand-offish and cold. I realized once I lived here that Mainers started that rumor so people won’t move here," he said. "It’s not true. It’s a very warm and accepting place. The people are so nice. But it is cold."
He said after several years of getting nowhere on the dating scene, three years ago he wrote a poem about his "perfect girl" that he put in a local paper, but he didn’t include a way for anyone to reach him. "
Maybe I watched (the movie) 'Message in a Bottle’ too much," he said. "I actually put the poem in the bottle and threw it in the ocean. I never heard back from anyone."
He describes himself as 5-feet, 9-inches tall, weighing less than 190 pounds. "I am not Brad Pitt but I am not the elephant man, either," he wrote in his ad. He travels widely, and he’s physically active, hiking, kayaking, whitewater rafting and such.
What kind of person is he looking for?"
She has to laugh, because I like to make things funny all the time. She has to love to travel. No grandmother or on the verge of becoming one. But she either want kids or has them. I really want a family. She has to love restaurants and I have two dogs, so she has to like dogs," he said.
He said he knows offering a reward for a future wife is a bit odd, but he said he doesn’t know what else to do. "I don’t drink, so I don’t go to bars very often. And I’ve been to churches, but I haven’t had luck there, either," he said.
"This is my way of being proactive. I know there are so many nice girls who are lonely just like I am," he said.
According to his ad, he already has a four-carat engagement ring, "and I even have our one-year anniversary gift."
So far, the York Weekly ad has only generated four responses. He also put the ad on Craigslist, and is having more success there, although "we’re just in the e-mail stage now."
He said if this latest effort doesn’t work, he’ll probably leave Maine. "I love Maine, but I can’t stand this 15 feet of snow without my soul mate," he said.
Interested? Haeberle’s e-mail address is Thetraveller207@yahoo.com.

This seems wrong. Or hillbilly.

Fortune: The love of your life will appear in front of you unexpectedly!

Dental Hygentist - m4w (Portsmouth )

Reply to: pers-6747xxxx@craigslist.org
Date: 2008-05-09, 7:34PM EDT
Are all Dental Hygentists completely crazy, insecure and insane?

No, but the people who think they are hygentists are.


Does everyone else thinks Cardinals are following them, or is it just me?
Every time I go outside the Cardinals start chirping and landing nearby.
Even when I come inside they're hanging out on the porch.
Maybe they want me to fill up the bird feeder...

Rotten

It only took a few hours, but I did manage to replace the rotten board underneath the back door. When I sat down, I thought it would go quickly. After 30 minutes I was wondering what I'd gotten myself into and perhaps I was highly under qualified for the job.

Before

At this point, I was really wishing someone hadn't built the stoop in front of that board.

Later, I was annoyed when I saw I was not going to be able to pull out these nails with my hammer. Thank goodness for pliers.

Phew. I finally got it all out.

Before I started, I cut off a piece of the gray painted wood, which was blocking the place where I needed to slide in the new board. I ended up buying a chisel 'cuz I still couldn't slide the board in. I had to get it around another piece of decking.

Getting the new board in was not easy, either. I really had to whack it. Bonus: I've been trying for days to set my watch back to regular time. I somehow switched it to military time awhile ago and I have no idea how I did it. No idea how to undo it. While contorting myself in all sorts of strange positions to get the old board out, I sat on my watch, which I was not wearing, and my butt cheek managed to fix it! Cool.
Fortune: Put your mind into planning today. Look into the future.

Attracted to my Hygenist - m4w - 40

Reply to: pers-6719xxxx@craigslist.org
Date: 2008-05-07, 5:14PM EDTI
doubt you will read this but just wanted to let you know that I think your gorgeous and I have a hard time maintaining my thoughts when we are together. I keep imagining that as you are over me and doing an exam you lower your face mask and plant a nice long slow kiss on me.Your married and I am married but would love to meet for lunch or something if you are interested. I am not sure if you feel the same way about me or your just doing your job but I thought I would give this a shot. Maybe the thought of finding someone attractive after rooting around in their mouth for an hour or so is beyond imagination but I have been thinking about this for a long time now and this is one way for me to find out. I don't want this to get weird or anything and I do not want to leave my wife so don't worry about that. If you are interested please write me back and tell me something about myself that we have talked about recently and we can take it from there. You work in Dover and are very sexxxxyy : )
Have a great day Gorgeous

YMCA

YMCA Parking Lot - Porsmouth - Saturday - m4w - 41
Reply to: pers-66xxxxx@craigslist.org
Date: 2008-05-05, 5:29PM EDT
Last Saturday, May 3rd, the pool was closing at the YMCA- it was about 3:10, or 3:15. I was standing in the locker room door of the Men's room, in my shorts, with no top - waiting for my little son to come back from the front desk. You were coming down the hall and stopped to wait for one of your kids (I think). We just kind of looked at each other. You were wearing jeans, black/brown clogs, you have long, slim legs, brown hair.. you are very beautiful. I would guess mid thirties.. something like that. As for me... I got dressed, and when I went to the Parking Lot, it looked like your husband was waiting for you to get into a mini-van. I think you had a Dalmation out in the Parking Lot, and it was sniffing around. You were waiting for the dog, it was starting to drizzle. As I got into my car, you walked back toward the mini-van, and you waved at me, as i was starting the car and pulling out with my little boy in the back. I waved back... knowing that with your husband there, I couldn't strike up a full blown conversation. I am divorced.. and couldn't take my eyes off of you... you are lovely. You waved, and I understand people wave and just say hello - I am not making more of it than that... but I wanted you to know that I thought you were so lovely, I just could not take my eyes off of you. I would never tire of looking at you. You belong to someone else.. but if you didn't... well.. I can dream can't I? If you see this, you can write and say hello. I'll withhold all the passionnate words I wish to say, because hey, what's the use?

Hey, what's the use of asking her to write and say hello? Keep your top on. Sheesh.

Fortune: The best times of your life have not yet been lived.