Love & Loafing

I've discovered why the personal ads in one particular city are better than the ones 'round here - format. Atlanta's Creative Loafing format includes witty and sarcastic answers. It covers broader types of people and has a less uptight feel. It also has a fill-in-the-blank and "take sides" section, which definitely tells you more about a person.
Some highlights -

Looking For:
No Preference
Friends
Friends with benefits
Some Action
Casual Dating
Long-term Relationship

Bod:
No Preference
Petite
Average
Full-Figured
Slender
Muscular
Curvaceous
Stocky
Wiry
Big & Beautiful
Height/Weight Proportionate
A Few Extra Pounds
Need the Gym
Beer Gut
Overweight
Decomposing

Locks:
No Preference
Platinum
Blonde
Red
Light Brown
Dark Brown
Black
Grey
White
Multi-Colored
Crayola-Colored
It Changes
Straight
Curly
Dreads
Mohawk
Shaved
Bald
Balding
No hair, thanks for asking. I'm bald, okay?

God:
No Preference
Agnostic
Atheist
Buddhist
Christian/Catholic
Christian Scientist
Christian/Protestant
Christian/Hateful
Christian/Wacko
I am The Christ
Jewish
Muslim
Mormon
None
Pagan
Scientologist
Cruisist
Travoltaist
Spiritual, not religious
Taoist
Unitarian

Kids:
No Preference
No
Yes, living with me
Yes, living with me part-time
Yes, not living with me
Have mine!

Want Kids:
No Preference
Yes
No
Not Sure
I want children to stay away from me

Drink:
No Preference
Never
Sometimes
Socially
Often
To excess
Not enough
I'm drunk right now

Political Leanings:
No Preference
Democrat
Green
Independent
Republican
Libertarian
Communist
Socialist
Whig
Merkin
Agnostic
Far Left
Hard Left
Soft Left
Nothing Left
Leftie
Right-Winger
Liberal
Moderate
Conservative
Christian Conservative
Fiscal Conservative
Neo-Con
Kinky

Get Around Town:
No Preference
Car
MARTA
Bicycle
Motorcycle
Scooter
Skateboard
Walk
Taxi
Limo
Segway

Spend Free Time:
No Preference
Reading
Creating
Drinking
Smoking dope
Playing sports
I'm in prison
Clubbing
Working out
Sex
Watching movies
Watching TV
Shopping
Dining out
Sleeping
Working
Biking
Traveling
What free time?

Fill In the Blank:
I consider myself an open-minded person, but my deal breakers are and
My favorite part of town is and my favorite thing to do there is
Something I said I'd never do but did anyway was
My ideal mate would have the brain of and the body of
It's Sunday morning at 10 a.m. If I'm not still sleeping, I'm
The quickest way to my heart is The quickest way to my bed is And in the morning, I like my eggs cooked
When I die, I believe I will go
I wouldn't be who I am if
I wouldn't sell for a billion dollars.
If people are what they eat, is a
If I could have any super hero power, it would be and I would use it

Take Sides:
Starbucks or Aurora Coffee
Centennial Park or Piedmont Park
Zoo Atlanta or Georgia Aquarium
CD or MP3
The Majestic or Waffle House
Hawks or Thrashers
Leopard Lounge or Lenny's
Six Flags or Stone Mountain
Shoemakers' Warehouse or Abbadabba's
Lenox or Phipps
Wireless or Landline
Little 5 Points or Atlantic Station


I think there are some folks that still end up with pretty bad ads - they don't do well filling in the blanks. I'll post some interesting ones this week.

Blah Blah Blah

Something something something. Nothing nothing nothing. Blah blah blah.

These are my mental notes of the goings-on the past few days. Work has been challenging, but I'm pretty sure I'm enjoying it. There is one aspect of the job that seems a little off, but I feel like it's almost completely a good match. Should I pay attention to the off part, or let it slide? The bright side is there are no Dwight Schrutes, Kellys or Kevins - well, there may be a Kevin. (Most offices have at least one of each.) If I take the job, which hasn't o-fficially been offered to me, I'm not committed to it for a lifetime. But I don't want to get stuck in something that ends up being difficult. Hmm... (deep thoughts)

I wish I had my camera with me the other day while I was having my lunch. It was bitterly cold outside - wind chills made it feel like 20 below - so I didn't walk during my break. Instead, I went to the parkway and sat in my car to eat. Picture me eating my peanut butter sandwich staring off into space. I finish my sandwich and start to eat an apple. Suddenly a gang of, like about 20, delinquent sea gulls fly in and park themselves on the parkway outside my driver side door. Some nestle on the ground, others are poised on one leg - all are giving me the evil eye. It was so weird, very weird. I momentarily thought, "I better lock the door." Um, right. Do you think they saw the apple? Why didn't they do it when I was eating my sandwich? Or was the whole thing a fluke - were they just on the parkway trying to warm up?

I Heart Freecycle

It's a wonderful thing. I can't believe some of the items posted as offers, though.

Here we go:
1. Almost full bottle botanical bounty foaming bath
2. 3/4 large container noxzema
3. 3/4 full body splash-rainbow of dreams
4. almost full vanilla perfume
5. 1/2 full estee lauder pleasures

An almost full bottle of foaming bath wash? You had it in your shower with you - naked? Eeew. Three quarters of a container of Noxzema? You dipped your hand in that container to clean your face and now you want me to dip my hand in to clean my face? Eeeew. There's no way I'm going to take a complete stranger's half full whatever of second hand pleasures! That's crazy.
I saw a listing similar to this before - there was a taker. Eeew. Would eeewe?

Mmm-mmm Good

I can't get enough of these Oh!s. They're good for breakfast, dinner, or a late night snack.

I was going to try and not spend any money on "things" for three months. Just the essentials - groceries, toiletries, birthday presents (for other people), and bills. I made it a week. Dang it! I shouldn't have gone to Home Depot. I really just wanted to look at light fixtures. But since I was there I figured I may as well buy one. I could probably justify the purchase. I do need to replace the light fixture out back. It works, but the motion sensor is busted. If I replace it, my electric bill goes down..? Maybe? Of course, I had to also buy a new piece for my drill to screw it in. Right? I will persevere. I will stick to my non-spending spree for the next 12 weeks.

I don't know why...

But I enjoy watching those wife swapping shows. Maybe I have a low IQ. I dunno. Every episode is the same - swap people that are complete opposites. Um, can you guess what's going to happen? I don't understand why people sign up when they know the stuff they love, love, love - base their lives on - could be trashed. Every week the swapped wives turn their new families lives upside down. The family that plays sports 24/7 has to give them up for a week. The family that eats only raw food must eat cooked food for a week. The family of pirates can't do anything piratey for a week. It is very entertaining.

Take the episode I watched the other night - the overly, anal family that organized and labeled everything. Everything. I missed some of it - you know, cuz' you gotta make yourself a cocktail when you peer into the lives of others - the family looked like they were labeling their clothing after they did the laundry. Gasp! They were so into labels, they had sections of their freezer labeled. The 11 or 12 year old daughter even had a drawer labeled "today's clothes" and "tomorrow's clothes". She sorted her outfits before wearing - days in advance! And when she'd go over to friends' houses - if they left the room - she'd tidy up while they were gone. She didn't like the mess. She would wait to do it until her friends left the room...she was hiding her need to be in a clean, organized environment. She was doing it in secret like a bad habit.

I'm organized and regimented in some ways, but I've chilled out in my old age. I realized being over-the-top organized is kind of a cop out. I was overly organized because I didn't trust myself to remember or to know or to think. It's like that family didn't want to have to think - they wanted the label to tell them what to do - where to put things, where to find them. But that's no fun. It's like being a child - being told what to do all the time. Thinking is good. It flexes your brain muscles. Sure, it's nice to go to the grocery store and recall that the beef section of your freezer was empty the last time you were in there. But what's the big deal if you forget to buy steak? It's probably not an issue - people who label sections of their freezer probably keep a detailed grocery list, organized in a little expandable folder full of to-do lists with them at all times. I dunno. Everything labeled and in a specific place is way too rigid. It's too restrictive.

Someone should do a study about Martha Stewartites. The folks who label sections of their closets and freezers, have a specific spot for everything they own, need to follow directions on how to make things look natural, what percentage will have memory problems in their later years?

Yeah. So. That's my rant.

I like me them wife swap shows. It is fascinating to see how other people live...even if it is an edited, for-entertainment-purposes-only version.

Before & After

This is my second winter in my little cottage - 572 square feet. The picture above is how she looked when I moved in Halloween 2005. There was something about the red that was too dark. Especially with the interior being so bright and airy. You can't see, but the front and back doors were painted red, too. I didn't like it ringed around the windows, either. And if you look closely, you'll see that the shutters were too long, except on one of the windows. This photo also shows pretty much the whole five hundredths of an acre I own - if you ever really can own a house.
This is how she looked yesterday morning. I'm still not done with the transformation - I have to put the flower boxes back up, which I painted a green similar to the doors. I'm still not sure if I like the green. I'm also not sure what to do about the old paint/new paint line. I've gone up about as far as my ladder will allow.

I almost like the house in the top picture better, but I think it's because of the sunshine. The bottom picture looks pretty dern drab. Is it the house or the grey winter morning light? I'll have to take another picture in the spring from the same angle. Maybe she looks a little plain without her red lipstick...I dunno. I like her better without shutters.

Recess

This was a great week for getting out during lunch (not including today, mind you - snow, sleet, rain). I made it down to Swasey Parkway, in Exeter to walk the path along the water Monday through Thursday. It's not a long path - about 20 minutes round trip. I could hear the ice cracking and popping. Yesterday, some lady came by and started to feed the sea gulls...I ran away in fear of getting pooped on. Throw your bread out on the ice...not on the parkway, fool! (Or foo', as Boyfriend would say.)